I’m not even sure how many parts there are going to be because it’s taken me 2 weeks to process my experience. So, I will start at the beginning.
From August of 1997 to June 2001 I attended a performing arts high school and as teenagers none of us had a clue as to what we were going to do but we knew we wanted to be creative and had no problem being in the spotlight. Somewhere along the way I made friends with incredibly motivated and talented people and kept in touch as best as I could. (Thanks FB!)
In April 2015 and I started this blog not having a clue about what I was doing but knowing I wanted to help people and overcome the fears I had. Somewhere along the way I started an Instagram account and really began to connect with people and projects.
In June 2015 we moved to Texas not having a clue as to what I was going to do once we moved but knew I wanted to keep my project going. Somewhere along the way I started to get to know people and began making friends who I would help out whenever I could.
In August 2015 I discovered Healthy Is The New Skinny (HNS) and I had no clue how to get involved with them but I knew I loved their message from the beginning. Somewhere along the way it just so happened that they were starting a blog and asked me to be a part of it after having read my blog.
Now, if you’ve been patiently reading and wondering what all of this has to do with me modeling the answer is: Everything.
Often times we are so focused on our goals we don’t realize the many incredible ways we are laying foundations to create opportunities. I am not a believer in luck. I believe we have the power to create the life we want for ourselves by preparing our mind, body, and spirit to work hard to get it.
In January 2016 I made it a goal of mine to model. I announced it to the world. I had no clue how to do that but I knew I had it in me to do it. All those years performing hadn’t been in vain! I eventually reached out to HNS as asked if they had any modeling opportunities and they did and they wanted me to join in!! Yay!
I should mention now that they are in Los Angeles and I am in Houston. Not exactly around the corner. I should also mention I am not working and while my fiance is super supportive I didn’t feel right asking him to pay for me to fly to California. Sooo my heart sank that the opportunity was going to pass me by. I was kind of ok with that but I felt defeated and disappointed. Here I am talking about finding and pursuing passions despite the odds and I was ready to throw in the towel. I almost did. Almost.
The date for the photo shoot was set and despite not having a clue how I was going to get there I put my name down.
I remembered that one of my awesome new friends worked for an airline. I asked her if she could get me on a buddy pass. Unfortunately the answer was no because her airline was international BUT her husband could because he worked a company that flew domestic! I just had to pay the taxes. Perfect.
Next, I wanted to reach out to the one friend I had in Los Angeles who I hadn’t seen in years but thanks to FB I saw she was going to be out of town that one week. Ugh. Bummer. She would probably think I was so weird for asking. So, I started looking at other alternatives but wasn’t too happy with what I found so I waited. Slightly beginning to worry I’d be sleeping at the airport.
Then, the email came that the photo shoot was moved to another day! Reprieve!
I had to make sure it was ok to change my buddy pass and not only was it ok but my friend talked it over with her husband and they were going to cover the cost of the taxes for all the times I helped them drive their son to school and watch their adorable dog!! My flight would be free. Then I reached out awkwardly to my long lost friend who emphatically said I was welcome to stay with them!! I had tears rolling down my cheeks that all of this was coming together. Holy cow!
You might believe that this opportunity came together over the course of two weeks but it didn’t. It’s been years in the making. We don’t even realize what we’re building sometimes and that can be a little frustrating but that’s when you have to have faith in your process. Not every gain is visible. You have to believe that when you are working on being the very best version of yourself that the universe will help you in every way possible. It may not always be in the ways or timing you anticipated but that just means it was not meant to be that way and that’s okay. Sometimes what is waiting is so much better and if we can let go of that fear of failure then we can accept and recognize when something more amazing is happening.
All of this did really get planned in two weeks time though. I reached out to HNS on January 28th and the photo shoot was all set for February 16th. Now that everything was all set all I had to do was make it to the airport and everything else would be smooth sailing. Right? This was meant to be so I had nothing to worry about right? Nope.
I began to panic. I had a knot in my stomach for those days leading up to the trip. Despite having to run a 5K with the kids on February 14th my mind was all on this photo shoot. Every worst case scenario began scrolling non stop through my head and I’m a really creative person which mean I made up one disaster after another. My flight would be cancelled. My outfit wouldn’t fit. I’d mess up. I’d oversleep. I’d embarrass myself.
So. Much. Doubt.
Finished my awesome #topless5K with my kids Sunday morning and by Sunday night I had my bag packed. This was going to happen one way or the other. I was filled with anxiety but that’s what this project is about. Finding the areas in which I need to grow. Finding the places where fear still has a grip and free myself from it. It’s being afraid but doing it anyway.
I made it to the airport and snagged the very last seat on the oversold flight. Sorry to the person who overslept or got stuck in traffic but I really appreciated the seat!
Stay tuned for Part 2!
Asking to lots of positive vibes as I work on what will be my very first public speaking engagement as Power To Prevail. I have spent the last 10 years training staff and love love love being in front of a crowd! It’s supposed to be like the one of the top 10 biggest fears but it is where I find the most energy.
This is a new group formed at a local university which supports leadership, empowerment, commitment, and service specifically aimed at body positivity.
My ultimate goal with Power To Prevail is to reach out and help as many people as I can with the gifts and talents I have been given. If you know of any other group or organization looking for speakers then give me a holler. I am super excited to see how far I can take this.
Finally, I turned 33! Yesterday was an amazing day of reflection for me. I sat to see just how much I did with one year of my life and I was moved. I can’t believe how much has transpired and it gets me pumped to embrace this year. I can’t thank you all enough for encouraging me and sharing in my journey. I have learned so much about myself and my journey. Let’s all keep going and growing together! xoxo